恋は思案のほか。

~ Four tears for Limei the Jiwawa (ROFL)

Tuesday, March 31, 2009 at 5:42:00 PM

Have you wonder why none of us asked you,
"Are you attached?"

Plainly because we tried our best to not ask you that.
In fact, we do you a favor and act like as if we don't know anything.

Why?
Doesn't this really puzzle you? Or is it that you didn't even notice this?
No, my purpose of writing this now is just to tell you how I am feeling about all this things that is going on. Or maybe how we feel.
Probably only me.

Firstly, we clearly know that you hate being talked about the things you do.
Secondly, you know that we will talked about it.
Thirdly, you always think that whatever you do is bad and causes us to talk about you.
Lastly, you hate being lectured.

First point, yes, we really know that you hate it, that's why probably you could see halo above all our heads.
We accept what you hate.

Second point, we talked about it cause we're concerned about what you are doing now, what could you be doing later on in future.
Who would dare to discuss with you about this? Nobody.
Refer to first point for reason.

Third point, I think that's what everybody face in their daily life too.
Everyone is sensitive. We think that when we leave bad impression to somebody, probably people will talked about it behind our back.
But if you're able to accept the fact that you're attached, accept the fact that you're going out with your bf,
Why deny about it? Why?... You know yourselves what is happening on lately in school.
We do know too. But maybe it might be 100% accurate.
But I chose to believe you. Why? Because I'm willing to ignore everything I heard and just accept what you had said because I trust you, I believe in you.
But sorry, curiosity exist in every human even yourselves.
I had known you for so long, I know the way on how you're gonna react to something.
But the way you react to this is what I don't expect to happen and everything gotten more fishy.

Without me knowing more about that in the first place, I already felt sad cause you denied it.
Nobody would be so lame to be fooling around saying those kind of thing to just irritate you but I thought probably he's just fooling around and I just ignored it.
But sorry, I can't just simply let it slip away cause like I said, nobody would go so far just to irritate you.
I just don't like people to deny what they had done.
Dare to do, dare to admit. Even if it takes courage. I believed you had chose and accept to face all this, didn't you?
Or maybe I should say, you didn't, because you denied.
I'm really dissapointed and sad because of what you had done wrongly, you know?

Last point, you hate being lectured.
To tell you this, we know you hate it. We really do. Many of us know you for quite a period of time or maybe years. Of course we do know that.
Why did we even bothered to lecture you? We or the person is seriously in guiding you the right way. If we know that you know what's the right way,
Nobody would be lecturing you or talking you out or being bothered by what you're doing.
Doesn't this make sense?
We do this because we care.
We do this because your actions doesn't prove anything and you take our past advice almost as it's nothing.
We do this because nobody wants to see you cry and worry because of r/s when things you had done went wrong.
We do this because we are your friends, we want you to know we're there for you always.

But please don't ignored what we had said before, because it hurts.
Please be honest if we asked anything. Nobody gonna scold you the moment we know.
Nobody said having a boyfriend is a crime.

I think if I'm gonna keep my thoughts quiet any longer, I feel guilty being your friend. I really do that's why I decided to tell you this.
I want you to know things that you don't know about of what I/we're thinking.

People may tend to dislike you in some ways but you couldn't possible make everyone like or love you cause nobody is perfect.

You may be blaming, hating us that we talked about you behind your back.
But we don't care about that.
Nobody can do things perfectly and make everyone feels satisfied because it is very a difficult thing to do. I think everyone can understand that.
But do you really think about what are your friends thinking about?

Why are your friends knowing so much about you?
They know so much about you and what's happening around you but do you know what's happening around your best friends?

Do you know why without you telling us anything, we know so much?
Because things changed. You probably never notice that. They might never notice that.
But I did.

Are you really concerning about your friends or maybe you're more concern about you yourselves feeling being loved by a guy?
We care yet you complain and bear all those stuffs and cry and share and told him everything you weren't happy about.
Does telling him or any outsider helps when we're the one you're suppose to tell us what you're unhappy about? Telling us, everyone can understand more what you're facing and your thoughts.
Yes, telling him can helps make you feel better. But what about us?
If he is your pillar of everything in just a blink, I'm sad being your friend.
You made me feel like a fool.
If he is your pillar of everything in just a blink, friends to you is just nothing.

I hate people to come to me when they're sad/angry, when they're happy, they behave like as if friends are not important anymore.
I hate that kind of feeling.
Don't you too?
It feels like as if you're just a nothing but just a bag that's filled with rice/bean for you to punch until you're feeling aright and then you leave.

We can accept you had done because we understand and we tried.
But are you able to accept and appreciate what we had done and said to you?
Liked I said before, just do whatever that it will makes you feel happy because I want you to feel happy.

You might be feeling angry or sad or happy after reading this. I apologies if you felt uncomfortable about this.
This is just something what I want to voice out because it's something you might not know.
Please don't hate us because we talked about you.
We care and you think you hate it.
When we tends to ignored you because of something, you think that everyone doesn't care about you anymore.
Probably that's the reason that the cycle repeats.
Please think properly about what you're gonna do and not make any friends leave you..

Please remember this.
It might take hell lots of courage to admit in something but, please
be honest in everything. If you live your life lying all the time, you should probably reflect on what you had done and think how much your mum had taught you and done for you.
When someone feel troubled or bothered by your doings, the reason is simple and easy.

That someone truly cares about you.
And that is your mum and friends that truly cares.

Trust isn't something easy to gain once you had lost it.
Probably you would have to face a lot of obstacles and get to the top again.

Regarding today, I don't understand why you had to shout/scold at Karhui.
I think you should really control on your temper.
You might be feeling or bottling many angry-ness inside you and we don't know about that but I would like to tell you that,
I assume that's suppose to be scolding and I think shouting or scolding is something that has a limit....
Karhui might act like as if she doesn't mind about that but I will want to tell you that I mind about how friends treat each other... you wouldn't want to lose a friend like her, do you?

Overall, you may not agree on what I had wrote.
But oh well. Everything just depend on how you wanna do.
I only hope you could see that everyone did their part and care for you and they gave in a lot to you.
That's all.

Twitter Updates